Victim of Love

The Ardor of God's Love

2006-01-27T23:12:00.000-06:00

O Jesus, how can I tell of your Love? The ardent desire You have to become one with each individual is beyond comprehension. You long with a great and burning desire for union with us. This longing causes You intense pain when You see that the soul chooses mere trifles instead of the overwhelming blessedness of becoming one with it's God. There is no spurned lover who can come close to the urgent longing of Love that You feel for each poor sinner who has turned away from the only thing that can bring him happiness ~ Your Divine Love. We were made to Love You and to be Loved by You. Every desire, every search for pleasure is a seeking for You alone. I must admit that to Love and be Loved by a creature is an awesome and beautiful thing, but it is nothing in comparison to the union and communion you desire to have with us. It is only a shadow compared to the Light, only a symbol compared to the only Reality there is... You are Love and to become one with this Love is the fulfillment of every hope and desire of every creature that has ever lived. Every beauty that I see is YOU, Every goodness that I perceive is YOU... You are ALL IN ALL.

Purification

2006-01-23T14:36:00.000-06:00

It's been a long time since I've written, and I've been through alot lately. I've been through the "valley of the shadow of death" and have been shown even more than before that I am capable of the most sacriligeous and grievous sins possible. I've been tried by temptation and I must confess that I have done very poorly. What a weak and sinful nature I have! Capable of harming those I love most because of pride and selfishness. Capable of anything and everything! There is no perversion that is too low for me to fall into. There is no crime that has been committed that I cannot do worse. Dear God, you have given me the grace to know and love a most beautiful soul. I give that soul to you. Keep him under the shadow of your wings and guard him, Lord. Make him as innocent as the Lamb, as spotless as Christ Himself. I would die for him, dear Lord. I offer my life for the glory, joy, and sanctification of that precious soul.

"There is no greator love than to lay down one's life for one's friends."

St. Therese--Act of Oblation to Merciful Love: Q&A

2005-09-27T23:00:00.000-05:00

Coming up in a few days is the feast of St. Therese of the Child Jesus and the Holy Face, the author of the Act of Oblation to Merciful Love. A great way to celebrate her feast day would be to make this offering to Merciful Love yourself. On her deathbed she begged Our Lord to choose many little "Victims of Love" and the most beautiful Little Catechism of the Offering to Merciful Love has been written. I encourage you to read it and then make the offering on October 1st. You will never regret it and many wonderful graces will come to you as a result. So go ahead and join the little legion of souls that has already offered themselves to Love, you have nothing to lose and Infinite Love to gain!

Feast of the Transverberation of St. Teresa of Avila

2005-08-26T13:35:00.000-05:00

Today Carmelites around the world celebrate the feast of the Transverberation of St. Teresa of Avila, Virgin, and Reformer of the Carmelite Order. The transverberation is a mystical grace wherein the Saint's heart was pierced with a "dart of love" by an angel. I quote St. John of the Cross, "It will happen that while the soul is inflamed with the Love of God, it will feel that a seraph is assailing it by means of an arrow or dart which is all afire with love. And the seraph pierces and in an instant cauterizes this soul, which, like a red-hot coal, or better a flame, is already enkindled. The soul is converted into an immense fire of Love. Few persons have reached these heights."

Saint Teresa died in 1582 after proclaiming that she was "a daughter of the Church". Her body was buried in a wooden coffin. After nine months it was exhumed and to everyone's amazement, though her clothes were decaying, her body was incorrupt. While the Carmelite nuns reclothed her a delightful perfume spread throughout the monastery. Later, her heart was removed to be enclosed in a crystal vessel and placed in a jeweled silver reliquary. When this was being done they beheld a glorious and wonderful sight: a wound from the angel's dart was visible! It can still be seen today at the Carmelite Monastery of Alba de Tormes in Spain. Her heart has kept it's color and since the nineteenth century three sharp thorns are visible at the base of the heart.

In the Liturgy for today's feast, the hymn for Evening Prayer is as follows:

Mild messenger of heaven's high King,
Forth from home's sheltering walls you set:
'Christ to the Pagan's land I'll bring
Or die a martyr!' - Ah, not yet: (as a child she set out on foot for Africa, being impatient to see God. She wanted to die a martyr at the hands of the Moors. Fortunately, her Uncle found her and brought her home.)

A sweeter pain, a death more dear
Must win for you a wider fame;
No mortal hand's to wield the spear
That kindles your consuming flame.

Victim of God's unbounded Love,
Let our heart's burn with like desire;
Lead all your retinue above
That none may taste eternal fire.

Jesu, celestial choirs adore
You, Bridegroom of all virgins pure,
And wedding-songs unceasing pour
While endless ages shall endure.

For further reading I recommend The Life of St Teresa by Herself, The Way of Perfection by St. Teresa of Avila, The Interior Castle by St. Teresa of Avila, and The Collected Letters of St. Teresa of Avila. All of these can be purchased at the Institute for Carmelite Studies... (just google it.)

Jesus, You want your Spirit of Love to blaze like fire throughout the world; may we, like Saint Teresa, be instrumental in keeping that flame of love alight.

You sanctify Your friends and reveal to them the mysteries of Your heart; unite our hearts to yours in a friendship so close and intimate that we may experience the secrets of Your Love, proclaim it to others, and win them to you.

You blessed the pure of heart and promised that they would see You; purify our sight so that we may see you in all things, and through all things be close to You.

You oppose the proud and give wisdom to the simple; make us humble of heart, so that we may receive Your wisdom for the sake of the Church. ~ Intercessions from the Carmelite Proper of the Liturgy of the Hours

The Father's Love Letter

2005-08-19T17:19:00.000-05:00

Let the God the Father speak to your heart in this video called The Father's Love Letter. The words are totally taken from the Word of God that pierces more surely than a two-edged sword. This is just beautiful - it spoke to me in a personal way and it will to you too if you open your heart and become like a little child.

It only takes about 5 minutes...

He Walked a Mile in Your shoes...

2005-08-03T21:26:00.000-05:00

Are you suffering from weakness, fatigue? Jesus did too.
Are you rejected by family and friends? Jesus was too.
Are you lonely? Jesus was too.
Are you grieving for a loved one who died? Jesus did too.
Do people think you're crazy? They thought Jesus was too.
Are you suffering from temptations? Jesus did too.
Are you hungry or thirsty? Jesus was too.
Are you cold? Jesus was too.
Are you suffering from the heat? Jesus did too.
Do you feel sorrow for those who are suffering? Jesus did too.
Are you crying for someone who has turned away from the truth and has listened to lies?
Jesus cried too.
Did your friends disappear when times got tough? Jesus' friends did too.
Was one of your closest loved ones unfaithful to you? Jesus' too.
Did you ask someone not to tell and they did anyway? Jesus too.
Did you help someone and receive no thanks in return? Jesus too.
Do you feel like God has abandoned you? Jesus did too.

Jesus, the Eternal Son of the Father, suffered all these things for Love of you; He walked a mile in your shoes.

Eternal Love

2005-07-21T15:38:00.000-05:00

During the rosary today I was thinking how awesome God is. He's ETERNAL. That's something that can make your head hurt, to think that He had no beginning, but always was and always will be. And since He's perfect and all-knowing that means that for all eternity, before the world was made, He knew you and loved you. Isn't that overwhelming? I encourage you to meditate on it for a few days and come back to it often. It's a thought that can last a lifetime. I've been thinking about it for a few weeks and it just gets more and more beautiful. And then to think that this Eternal, Divine Being created us with a free will so that we could choose to Love Him in return. You see, if He hadn't given us free will (the ability to choose between good and evil) then we wouldn't be able to freely Love Him. We would be like puppets or a robot that's been programmed to obey and serve someone. He didn't want it that way, but gave us the awesome responsibility to choose. We have a choice and are free to choose to Love our Creator (who Loves us with a Love so great that we can't comprehend it), or to reject His Love. Of course, He knew that giving us the ability to choose would open the way to evil and suffering, but all suffering comes from man and his sin, not from God. So many people question why there is suffering in the world and even have the nerve to blame God for it. But there's no one to blame but ourselves. Every bit of suffering on this earth is the fruit of our sinful choices or the choices of our ancestors, all the way back to our first parents, Adam and Eve. It is sin that brought sickness, suffering, and death into the world. But wait!! There's more!!! Because man chose to sin and lost eternal joy and glory because of it - this Almighty, Eternal, All-Powerful, All-Knowing, All-Loving, Divine Being who made us didn't want us to be lost forever. So He became man Himself... He clothed His Divinity in flesh and came on this earth to suffer hunger, thirst, weariness, pain, humiliation, etc. All the things He had never and would never have felt in His heavenly glory... And not only to suffer, but to DIE! So that we could get to heaven and rejoice with Him for all eternity! WHAT LOVE AND MERCY! Think about it. Remember always that God Loves you as if you were the only person in the world and He would have done it all just for you. This is a truth that so many people don't know about. We must Love Him for those who choose not to. We must Love Him greatly... with His own Love...therefore we can Love Him INFINITELY!!! We are called to Love Him and what glory will be ours when we get to heaven! We will see all those who went to heaven because of our Love! We will have numberless children in heaven who would have been lost forever but are there for all eternity only because we chose to Love this God who is so Loveable! My heart beats fast and hard when I think of it! I want you to know what I know, I want you to Love Him as I do! (Or rather, as I DESIRE to do; for I don't Love Him enough.)

I will leave you with a little story told by St. Alphonsus Liguori that I read at the beginning of my conversion over ten years ago and it has stayed fresh in my memory ever since:

"We read in history of a proof of love so prodigious that it will be the admiration of all ages: There once was a king, lord of many kingdoms, who had one only son, so beautiful, so holy, so amiable, that he was the delight of his father, who loved him as much as himself. This young prince had a great affection for one of his slaves; so much so that, the slave having been condemned to death, the prince offered to die for the slave; the father, being jealous of justice, was satisfied to condemn his beloved son to death, in order that the slave might remain free from the punishment that he deserved ; and thus the son died a criminal's death, and the slave was free from punishment.

This fact, the like we have never seen in this world, and never will happen, is related in the Gospels, where we read that the Son of God, the Lord of the Universe, seeing that man was condemned to eternal death in punishment for his sins, chose to pay by His death the penalty due to man."

St. Maria Goretti, pray for us!

2005-07-06T19:46:00.000-05:00

October 16, 1890 - July 6, 1902

Saint Maria Goretti was martyred in defense of the virtue of purity. To read more about her go to http://www.mariagoretti.org. The above painting is how she actually looked. May she intercede for our world today and help young women to remain pure and modest. May she reveal to us the beauty of true femininity.

In Defense of Pope Pius XII

2005-06-14T14:55:00.000-05:00

I've heard many people say that Pius XII was an enemy of the Jews during World War II. I've also heard people say that he was too much of a coward to help them. If you want to know the real story, you can start by reading this:Zenit News Agency

The Truth Will Set You Free

2005-06-09T22:45:00.000-05:00

O my God, eternal Truth, Beauty beyond comprehension, I beg You to look down with Love on the ignorant; look down upon those who have been lied to, abused, or hurt in any way. My God, You are so Good that if only they knew You they would Love You. My heart aches for all those in error and sin. Have mercy on us! Lead us into the Light where peace and joy are found. Have pity and compassion on Your poor wounded children and let one drop of the Precious Blood of Jesus fall upon our souls. One drop is enough to heal every creature who ever has or ever will exist. For the sake of the suffering of the Sacred Heart of Jesus and the Heart of the Immaculate Conception grant my request. Saint Joseph, pray for us! Saint Therese, pray for us!

Courage Apostolate

2005-06-09T18:20:00.000-05:00

Courage Apostolate - the following is from the home page of COURAGE

Are you or a loved one experiencing homosexual attractions and looking for answers?
Courage, an apostolate of the Roman Catholic Church, ministers to those with same-sex attractions and their loved ones. We have been endorsed by the Pontifical Council for the Family and our beloved John Paul II said of this ministry, "COURAGE is doing the work of God!"

From our website you will learn about homosexuality and chastity. By developing an interior life of chastity, which is the universal call to all Christians, one can move beyond the confines of the homosexual identity to a more complete one in Christ.
In Courage, you will get to know men and women who share in your concerns, meeting them online or in person at chapter meetings, Conferences and Days of Recollection.
Come see what we are about. Browse our pages. Get to know our community. You'll be glad you did!

Dear Enlightenment,

2005-06-09T01:15:00.000-05:00

I will continue to pray for you. I can assure you, I am not addressing an eclipse, but the ONE Who's Love and Beauty, Power and Might overshadows every creature in the universe. (I know this by experience.) If your soul would one day "ecleipo", then I wouldn't bother... but since you have an immortal soul that is priceless - not only will I pray but I would be willing to suffer to lead you into what I am firmly convinced is the Truth.

Catholicism is not Christian Fundamentalism. It is the Way of Love, the Source of Supernatural Life, and it is the Treasurehouse and Guardian of the Truth. It has never threatened civilization, on the contrary, wherever and whenever true Catholicism has flourished so has civilization flourished. The only thing that threatens civilization is sin - and this thing called sin shows itself in numberless ways. It is us - poor, wounded, and hurting human beings - who refuse to seek for Truth and instead seek to gratify our selfish desires who threaten civilization.

Now Enlightenment, of course I have been listening to Pope Benedict XIV's words - he is my Papa.

Regarding Father Thomas Reese - he resigned. I know the media often distorts the news and trys to make those who are speaking out in a way that is not in line with the values of the "world" look bad... Father Jose de Vera (who is the spokesman for the Jesuits in Rome) said that Father Reese decided to resign after talking over the situation with his Jesuit superiors. He became uneasy after Cardinal Ratzinger became Pope because he knew he was not following the teachings of the Church. A person who belongs to the Catholic Church and has the audacity to call themselves Catholic (this is an ordained priest who is also a member of a religious order and had willingly made a vow of obedience) while being totally disobedient to many of its teachings is a hypocrite!

"The issues of the day" are NOT issues with the Catholic Church in that they can dictate what the Church will teach. Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today, and forever. What is a sin today will always be a sin and there is NO changing that. Fornication, Adultery, Masturbation, Murder, Divorce, etc. - these things can never be condoned and the Catholic Church is too good a Mother to tell her children that these things are OK. No matter how many tears and tantrums her spoiled children throw - She will not give in to their whims because She Loves them and wants them to experience the fullness of Joy that comes from a clean conscience and friendship with God.

Pope Benedict was a very close friend with Pope John Paul II, but he was not the power behind his throne. The Power behind John Paul's pontificate was Almighty God who instituted the Papacy Himself to speak out and teach the truth of faith and morals. Ratzinger has never craved power... As a matter of fact, several years ago he asked Pope John Paul II to retire. He wanted to spend his later years reading, praying, and writing. Pope John Paul refused. Fast forward to April 2005. On April 20, one day after he was elected Pope, Benedict XVI said, "In my soul there are two contrasting sentiments... a sense of inadequacy and human turmoil for the responsibility entrusted to me... on the other hand... profound gratitude to God who does not abandon His flock, but leads it throughout time, under the guidance of those whom He has chosen as Vicars of His Son, and made Pastors... I consider this a grace obtained for me... by Pope John Paul II. Its seems I can feel his strong hand squeezing mine; I seem to see his smiling eyes and listen to his words... 'Do not be afraid!'... Surprising every prevision I had, Divine Providence called me to suceed this great Pope!"

Pope Benedict is portrayed by the media as "God's Rottweiler". I have seen a very different man who exudes humility and gentleness. He is a very intelligent intellectual, but at the same time he knows he is only a human being who makes mistakes and is unable to fulfill his high calling (which is really only the office of a servant) without the help of God. One of the titles the Church gives the Pope is "Servant of the servants of God."

You go on to quote Pope Benedict on homosexual marriage, homosexual adoption, and the acts of homosexuals. My dear person, he is only speaking what the Church has been teaching since its institution. He is only repeating what God has revealed to us - His beloved children. When I tell my sweet little girl that she cannot have chocolate candy every time she pleases, I'm not telling her this because I hate her. No, I'm telling her this because I Love her and I know that chocolate is not the best thing for her... that it will make her teeth rot, and her blood sugar go up, and it will do nothing to nourish her growing body. She doesn't understand this as all she knows is that it gives her great pleasure, so she cries and stomps her feet and begs... and if it were within her reach she would take it and eat it always. But I say no because I know better, I know it's not good for her. Now one day when she's older and on her own she might choose not to obey the teachings of her mother. She might indulge in all sorts of junk food and become very overweight and have health problems and die an early death because of her gluttony. I will be able to do nothing about because she has her own free will. I tried to teach her, but she just didn't listen and now she pays the consequences. In sort of the same way, God knows better than us. He knows what will hurt us , so He tells us not to do it. Unfortunately, some of us cry and throw a fit when we hear "the voice of conscience". Then we take matters into our own hands and do as we please. The consequences sometimes come along very much later, but believe me, they come; and they come in ways we had never imagined. Again, this is something I know from experience.

It seems you are ignorant of what the Church teaches about homosexuality. (And I'm not calling names here, I acknowledge that I am ignorant of many, many things.) I will quote directly from the Catechism of the Catholic Church here:

"Homosexuality refers to relations between men or between women who experience an exclusive or predominant sexual attraction towards persons of the same sex. It has taken a great variety of forms through the centuries and in different cultures. Its psychological genesis remains largely unexplained. Basing itself on Sacred Scripture, which presents homosexual acts as acts of grave depravity, tradition has always declared that "homsexual acts are intrinsically disordered." They are contrary to the natural law. They close the sexual act to the gift of life. They do not proceed from a genuine affective and sexual complementarity. Under no circumstances can they be approved."

"The number of men and women who have deep-seated homosexual tendencies is not negligible. They do not choose their homosexual condition; for most of them it is a trial. They must be accepted with respect, compassion, and sensitivity. Every sign of unjust discrimination in their regard should be avoided. These person's are called to fulfill God's will in their lives and , if they are Christians, to unite to the sacrifice of the Lord's Cross the difficulties they may encounter from their condition."

"Homosexual persons are called to chastity. By the virtues of self-mastery that teach them inner freedom, at times by the support of disinterested friendship, by prayer and sacramental grace, they can and should gradually and resolutely approach Christian perfection."

In regard to your comment, "There's no such thing as 'woman' in Pope Ratzo's world." I would say that you are completely wrong. "Man" as he used it would mean "Mankind" which means both men, women, and children. This is just common sense. There is much written about the dignity of women in the Catechism and in all the documents of the Church, including the encyclical letters of the Popes down through the ages. The creature (notice I said creature, not God) that we honor (notice I said honor, not worship) above all other creatures is a woman: the Blessed Virgin Mary... a little Jewish girl who was chosen by God to give birth to and nourish and care for God made man in Jesus Christ. Pope Benedict has written, "People have realized that the complete removal of the feminine element from the Christian message is a shortcoming from an anthropological viewpoint. It is theologically and anthropologically important for woman to be at the center of Christianity."

I am so sorry that you or someone you love has had to endure the least bit of "hatred, violence, and persecution." I assure you that those who truly "Love the Lord" have no hatred in their hearts, but only Love.
We hate sin, but love the sinner.
We hate sin because it offends God and hurts the sinner.
We are sinners ourselves, but are striving to be holy with the abundant help of God.

And finally, I do not look at the world through rose-colored glasses - I prefer to look through a very beautiful pair of spectacles called faith. I see you know a bit of German ;.). Pope Benedict's worldview is the same as my worldview - Catholic. As I said before - the truths that Jesus Christ taught have been handed down since the time of the Apostles and they are the same yesterday, today, and forever! To call them medieval is just to repeat a tired old line that the world keeps singing in it's futile attempts to do away with the Catholic Church.

(please excuse my typos... it's late and I'm too tired to read over what I wrote)

Yours truly,
littleone

Modesty

2005-06-05T14:20:00.000-05:00

I'll just throw out some thoughts here... Like I said, I'm not an intellectual... if I were I would write a book... but since I'm unable to articulate everything that I know about this subject I'll just throw out a list of some of my thoughts:

*If more women dressed modestly there would be a great lessening in the murder of children
*Modesty = respect for women = less fornication, adultery, etc. = the end of abortion
*Men look at women as objects because of the abundance of pornography and revealing styles women wear... not only women, but now also very young girls... this leads to perversion, pedophiles, etc.
*without the participation of women the pornography industry would not exist
*women enter the pornography industry because they are seeking love and acceptance
*they will never find love and acceptance there but only more abuse and disrespect
*Every woman will find her "Prince Charming" only in Jesus Christ Who will give INFINITE LOVE AND ACCEPTANCE and will lead the woman to her true vocation where she will reach her highest dignity as a child of God
*a woman dressed with modesty does not have to look "frumpy" but can appear very feminine and beautiful... much more beautiful than with skimpy clothing... beautiful clothing is an adornment
*if women dressed beautifully and modestly then it would bring out the deep yearning in men's hearts to be "protectors"... It would lead to a kind of noble knighthood in man to act with integrity towards the GIFT of woman
*woman can LIFT UP man or bring him down to the level of an animal

Do Your Part to End Abortion...

2005-06-05T00:53:00.000-05:00

Dress Modestly!

Our Loving Father

2005-06-01T22:39:00.000-05:00

I've been thinking about my heavenly Father lately. I ordered a book by Mother Eugenia and read a few pages before prayer today. It's called The Father Speaks to His Children and is a book of messages from God the Father to Mother Eugenia that is approved by the Church. It is the only one of it's kind. I became ecstatic reading those few pages and during prayer I rested peacefully in my Father's arms. How loving He is and how little known! It is He who sent His Son Jesus to die for the sins of mankind! It is He who would have sent Our Lord to earth to die for my sins alone if I were the only one who needed to be redeemed! He loves and cherishes us more than the best of fathers. He longs to be loved in return. He waits for our confidence and desires. How He longs to hear a word or to see a look of Love from His beloved children. If He was better known He would not be feared at all. Our sins are nothing compared to our Love. He said that "For Me, your sins are like iron, and your acts of Love like gold. If you gave Me a thousand pounds of iron, it would not be like giving Me just ten pounds of gold! In other words, with just a little Love, great iniquities can be expiated."

It is so easy to become a saint! I believe this with all my heart and nothing can make me disbelieve it! All it takes is the desire and the will to do it. If you want to become a great saint, then you can. With God all things are possible. Turn to Him with trust and Love - even if you think you have none. If you have the desire to trust and Love - that is sufficient. Start with that desire and ask for more. My God I long to Love You as You have never been Loved before, grant me this gift, although I am unworthy of it. Make of me what You want and then all my dreams will come true. My one desire is to become what You want me to become, no matter how insignificant or how great - that is not what matters. What matters is that You are pleased with me. That I can make you smile. That I can give delight to Your Heart. You are my all in all!

"If we become what God intended for us to become, we will set the world on fire!" ~ St. Catherine of Siena

A New Tradition...

2005-05-31T22:32:00.000-05:00

Today for the feast of the Visitation I made Molten Chocolate Cakes. They look like little chocolate cakes on the outside, but there's a surprise inside when you take a bite - warm, gooey, melted chocolate oozes out! (They didn't come out perfect - but hey! It's my first time!) As we were eating them I told the kids the symbolism... I said that just as our dessert looks like a plain chocolate cake on the outside, so did Our Lady appear to be like any other woman to the outside world. And just as we got a delightful surprise inside the cake, Our Lady was carrying the most delightful surprise for us in her womb - tiny baby Jesus! The boys came up with their own symbolism. They said that just like the melted chocolate poured out of the cake so did St. John the Baptist jump for joy... Oh the joys of family life!! ;.)

If anyones interested here's the recipe:

1/2 cup unsalted butter
6 ounces of semi-sweet chocolate (I used Hershey's milk chocolate bars)
1/2 cup cocoa powder
1/8 tablespoon salt
2 large egg whites
1/8 teaspoon cream of tartar
2 tablespoons granulated white sugar

Preheat oven to 400 degrees
Butter 6 individual cupcake molds and dust the inside with granulated sugar
In a bowl over a saucepan of simmering water, melt butter, chocolate, cocoa powder, and salt
Whip the egg whites until frothy, add cream of tartar and whip until peaks form, add 2 tablespoons sugar and whip until stiff peaks form
Gently fold into chocolate mixture (do not overmix)
Pour into molds about 3/4 full
Bake for 5-8 minutes or until outside edges of cake is set but the middle looks a little wet
Remove from oven and invert onto serving plate
Serve with a dollop of whipped cream or powdered sugar (or both like I did)
Enjoy!

A taste of Old Russia

2005-05-20T19:38:00.000-05:00

Our homeschool has started a study on Russia and I'm reading a really great book called My Russian Yesterdays by Catherine Doherty. If you want to find out all that you've missed in this materialistic and media saturated culture this book will give you a pretty good idea. I would love to give my children just a little bit of the joy and peace that Catherine received from the simple life these good Russian Catholics lead. I'm also going to look into planting my own herb garden - read the book and you'll see why. These hard-working Russians found God in work, nature, and family.

It's a simple read and can be read in one lazy summer day. I give it five stars! I'll definitely be reading more of Catherine Doherty.

The Tree of Life

2005-05-20T13:57:00.000-05:00

Today as my children and I were driving back from a tour of St. John's Cathedral in Lafayette, Louisiana we were praying the Sorrowful Mysteries. Often as I look at the trees around me I am reminded of the Crown of Thorns... Every tree is a reminder to me of the Passion of Our Lord. The rounded tops are the Crown of Thorns, the branches reaching upward remind me of His outstretched arms, the wood of the tree reminds me of the cross He carried and was crucified on.

A tree played a part in our fall, the first sin of Adam; a tree played a part in our redemption, the crucifixion of Christ. How often Our Lord must have thought about this as He worked with wood, making tables, chairs, and all sorts of things with St. Joseph and then later alone to support His mother and Himself. What sorrow and what joy must have passed through that Sacred Heart as He thought of the ravages of sin and of the way He would make up for it. How much I owe to You, Sweet Jesus, for You saved my soul from hell. You Loved me before I was born and for all eternity You desire for me to be with You! I thank You and I will thank You forever!

Confidence and Love Obtains All

2005-05-13T00:45:00.000-05:00

A while back I wrote something I believe with a firm conviction: that when we fall into sin and return with sorrow and humility we gain more than before our fall. How happy I was to read today a quote from Saint Therese that echos my belief. She says that "when we return to Him He Loves us even better than before our fault... Yes, in an act of Love, even unfelt, all is retrieved and more."

As time goes on I come to see how wretched and little I really am. I'm such a simple soul and would never be accepted by the intellectuals of today... I know that I am nothing and less than nothing in the world's eyes. Even in Catholic circles I have a pretty good idea that I am looked upon as 'stupid' or 'weird'. Again Therese comes to my rescue and puts everything in perspective, "Sometimes when I read certain treatises where perfection is set forth as beset by a thousand obstacles, my poor little head grows very soon weary. I close the learned book which puzzles my brain and dries up my heart, and in its stead I open the Holy Scriptures. Then all appears to me in clear light; one single word discloses to my soul infinite horizons, perfections seems easy, I see that it suffices to recognize our nothingness, and to leave oneself like a child in the arms of the good God. I leave to great souls and sublime intellects books which I cannot understand, still less put in practice. I rejoice in being little, since children only and those who resemble them will be admitted to the celestial Banquet." She tells me "You are very little, remember; and when very little, one has not beautiful thoughts." And my heart is filled with joy and confidence when I read her words about the Mercy of the Lord to His little ones "'For to him that is little, mercy is granted.' (Wisdom 6:7) It is possible to remain little even while filling the most exalted positions and even in extreme old age... and it is written that at the end the Lord shall arise to save all the meek of the earth; it does not say judge, but to save." Little ones will not be judged. Saint Thomas Aquinas wrote in his catechism: "Of the good also, some will be saved and shall not be judged. They are the poor in spirit for God's sake who rather shall judge others." What more is there to say? If all could know and believe this what an explosion of sanctity we would see!

What will heaven be like?

2005-04-30T20:10:00.000-05:00

The smile of a child?
The melodious song of birds in the evening?
The beauty of a freshly plucked rose?
The sweet smell of the most fragrant of flowers?
The coolness of dew on the grass on a summer's morn?
The innocence of a newborn baby?
The blazing beauty of an awe-inspiring sunset?
The glorious sight of a multi-colored bow encircling the sky?
A golden sea of buttercups on a bright sunny day?
A beautiful maiden who has not lost her innocence?
A stately young man so handsome and grand?
A choir of children singing joyful songs?
The love between lovers enraptured at the sight of one another?
A mother's arms?
A father's protection?
The rays of the sun peeking out from behind the clouds?
A first kiss?
The embrace of a long lost loved one?
Sitting by the fire with a loving family?
Relaxing conversation between friends?
Finding out the one you love is deeply in love with you?
The forgiveness of a loved one whom you have hurt?
The peace one feels while praying in a secluded spot?
The majestic sight of a mountain or canyon?
The taste and comfort of a home cooked meal?
The joy of a festival?
The anticipation and excitement of a child on Christmas Eve?
The refreshment of a long vacation?
The satisfaction of a job well done?
The joy of making someone smile?
Loving and being Loved for all eternity?
What will heaven be like?
"Eye has not seen, ear has not heard, nor has it even entered into the heart of man, what God has prepared for those that Love Him."

Mary, Our Loving Mother

2005-04-22T11:48:00.000-05:00

I mentioned earlier that the moon is a symbol of Our Lady. This is something that I love to meditate on. It delights me to stare up at the night sky and see the full moon in all its glory and the shining stars gathered around it... Some brighter than others... In the moon I see the glory of Our Lady and in the stars the lesser glory of the saints.

Of course Our Lady's glory is only a reflection of the glory of her Son, just as the moon doesn't shine with it's own brilliance but reflects the light of the sun. And since she is the Immaculate Conception she reflects the glory of God in a much brighter, more perfect way than all the saints who ever were or ever will be.

I was also interested to see a map of the moon. Scientists have named the dark areas "seas" even though there is no water on the moon. In Latin they are called "mare" pronounced "Mah-ray". Sounds alot like Mary to me... What's even better is that some of the seas seem to describe our heavenly Mother. There's Mare Fecunditatis, Mare Nectaris (she's most sweet), Mare Nubiuim (she's symbolized in the little cloud the size of a man's hand in the story of Elijah; a cloud that brings forth rain after a long drought, rain symbolising the grace we received through the Son she brought forth), Mare Serenitatis, Mare Tranquillitatis, Mare Orientale (Our Lady of the East), and Mare Cognitum (Our Lord has made known to us her glory). They don't all seem to point to her, but it's nice to know that some of these "maria" could be her titles.

Oh, how I love Our Lady! If more people knew her, then more people would know her Son and they would Love Him more. Dear Lord, make your mother known and Loved, for Your names sake. Amen.

Habemus Papem!!!

2005-04-19T14:43:00.000-05:00

We have a Pope!!

Joseph Cardinal Ratzinger has been elected as the 265th pontiff. He took the name of Benedict XVI. What a "blessing" he is! It was a cloudy day in Rome but the moment of the announcement the sun began to shine! The Gospel for the day read, "How long will you keep us in suspense?" The Jews were asking Our Lord if He was the Christ, but we all were asking Our Heavenly Father today, "How long..." and the answer finally came at 6:04 pm Roman time. So let us sing the entrance antiphon in our hearts: Let us shout out our joy and happiness, and give glory to God, the Lord of all, because he is our King, alleluia!

His first words to us: "Dear brothers and sisters, after the great Pope John Paul II, the cardinals have elected me - a simple, humble worker in the vineyard of the Lord. The fact that the Lord can work and act even with insufficient means consoles me, and above all I entrust myself to your prayers. With the joy of the risen Lord and confidence in His constant help, we will go forward. The Lord will help us and Mary his Most Holy Mother will be alongside us. Thank you."

THANKS BE TO GOD!

A Marian Treasury

2005-04-14T18:57:00.000-05:00

Today at Mass I was struck with how the Host resembles the moon. As I thought about it I'm sure it's no coincidence that the moon has always been thought of as a symbol of Our Lady. Pope John Paul II has called Mary "a woman of the Eucharist". It is because of Our Lady's "Fiat" that we have the Eucharist and it is truly Flesh of her flesh and Blood of her blood. If you want to read our beloved Pope's thoughts on Our Lady Sr. Marianne Trouve, FSP has compiled them in a beautiful book called A Marian Treasury.

Little Rewards

2005-04-14T18:38:00.000-05:00

Yesterday I decided to fast until 3:00 in reparation for the great sacrilege that has been committed on Ebay regarding the Eucharist. I took only a little bread and water at noon, and since I'm a nursing mother, I was feeling very weak by the time 3:00 rolled around. At about 3:10 I spotted my neighbor walking up the street to my house with a plate full of German Chocolate Cupcakes! She handed them to me and told me the Holy Spirit had inspired her to make them and bring them to me! (She had no idea I was fasting.) Again I say, how sweet Our Lord is!

2005-04-09T22:03:00.000-05:00

Today after Mass I went for a walk at our town's very small nature park. As I was walking up the gravel path a little rock fell into my shoe. I decided to leave it there in honor of the wound in the right foot of Our Lord. So there I am walking along, enjoying the sweet smell of the pure, breezy air and I walk right past a woman who had just decided to light up a cigarette. Such a small thing, but it irritated me. So I said, "For You dear Lord." And then I remembered the times when I used to smoke. Times that I really didn't want to remember. I felt truly sorry for those times and I said, "Lord, I'm so sorry for smoking cigarettes, and even more sorry for all the horrible things I did during those times." And I heard an answer in the depths of my heart, "What things? I don't remember anything." How sweet!

Enthronement of the Sacred Heart

2005-04-08T22:20:00.000-05:00

Today our parish priest came to our home to enthrone the Sacred Heart of Jesus. I was blessed to have Mass said in my kitchen on the very table that we eat at today. May Jesus reign in our family and be King of our lives. I was so joyful today as I cleaned house to prepare for tonight. The sun was shining, our wisteria bush was in full bloom, the yard was bedecked with buttercups, and I had a special prayer in my heart. It was a prayer similar to one I prayed years ago, a few days after Mother Teresa died. I reflected on the fact that since Pope John Paul II had died there was a lot less Love on this earth than before. With great confidence in God's mercy and knowing full well that when we ask we receive, I begged God to fill my heart with the same amount of Divine Love that the earth had just lost. I also asked the priest to say this prayer for me during the consecration. I feel sure that my prayer was answered. Two things that happened today assure me that it was: This morning my heart was pierced by something someone said to me. This was done to open my heart to receive this Love. After the enthronement I felt humiliated and my soul was filled with bitterness. This is a suffering that is caused by the Fire of God's Love alone. These sufferings seem to come from exterior happenings, but I know better. Also, the priest spoke only about Divine Love during the homily and used Mother Teresa and Our Holy Father as examples. I thank you, O Lord, for Your great mercy and kindness and that You look with Love on such a miserable thing as me.

Do Little Things With Great Love...

2005-04-05T22:46:00.000-05:00

"If you feel too lazy to pick up a bit of thread, and you nonetheless do it for the love of Jesus, you have more merit than some great accomplishment made in a moment of fervor.” ~ St. Therese

I give ALL to You

2005-04-05T15:10:00.000-05:00

O my Jesus, I Love You and want to make You Loved! Yet I am one of the worst sinners who ever lived. And if I look at all the graces You have given me then I can say that I am the most responsible for Your sufferings. Not that I'm an important soul or that You need me to "save the world", but that I am the most wretched nothing that has ever crucified You. Even after You showed me Your infinite Love, I murdered You. I disdained Your gifts and sought after human love. I deeply regret all that I have done to hurt You and Your Most Holy Mother. But I know that You "make all things new". Renew me and make me like a virgin once again, for I am old and weary. Make me pure, O Mother, with your immaculate purity. Transform me, Jesus, into Your very self. I want to suffer the deepest torments for Love of You and I don't want to be rewarded. I take the last place, dear Lord, not only here on earth but also in heaven. Let everyone who would have been under me move up a notch. Yes, I want my whole being to Love You, but if it would make You smile then I sacrifice that too. I accept not Loving You as much as I desire for all eternity if it would please You and make others burn with Love for You. What does it matter if it be me or someone else who Loves You as You deserve. I don't deserve to Love You at all. The only thing I deserve is hell. Yet I have great confidence in You and purgatory does not worry me. I keep nothing for myself - no merits, no indulgences, nothing at all. I give it to you my Lady for you to do with as you desire. I am all Yours and I will hold nothing back. I want to Love you also, sweet Mother, and make you known and Loved. How can I do this? I am nothing and obnoxious to all that I meet. I understand that even on a merely human level I have no talents at all. I once read about a saint being canonized and the title said, "Poor in Talents, Rich in Love". This delighted me. Thank you Lord for all the graces you have bestowed upon that soul. Thank you for all You have done for me.

Miracles do happen!

2005-04-04T23:17:00.000-05:00

Holy Father, pray for us!

I urge you to pray to Pope John Paul II for any intentions you may have. I promise you'll not be sorry. Two hours after his most holy death, I knelt down and prayed for my very troubled husband and it has been miraculous! He has changed from frowning to smiling, from tearing our family down to being kind - this is a HUGE MIRACLE! My prayers for him for years have basically gone unanswered and it took Pope John Paul the Great a mere 3 hours! Now I pray that he will not lose the grace through his own fault that Our Holy Father has gained for him.

To my Holy Father: Pope John Paul II

2005-04-01T15:39:00.000-06:00

My dear, dear Papa... How I wanted to meet you one day, to kneel at your feet and kiss your ring, but I never got the chance. How I wanted to ask you to pray for me and those I love because I knew that your prayers were very powerful with God. Now it looks like the end. Though I'm still praying and waiting for a miracle, how gloriously happy you will be when you stand before Our Lord and receive His eternal embrace.

I Love you, dear Papa. Remember me when you come into your kingdom.

St. Thomas Aquinas on the Resurrection of the Dead

2005-03-29T13:48:00.000-06:00

QUALITIES OF THE RISEN BODIES
There is a fourfold condition of all those who shall take part in the resurrection.
(a) The Identity of the Bodies of the Risen.--It will be the same body as it is now, both as regards its flesh and its bones. Some, indeed, have said that it will not be this same body which is corrupted that shall be raised up; but such view is contrary to the Apostle: "For this corruptible must put on incorruption." And likewise the Sacred Scripture says that by the power of God this same body shall rise to life: "And I shall be clothed again with my skin; and in my flesh I shall see my God."
(b) The Incorruptibility of the Risen Bodies.--The bodies of the risen shall be of a different quality from that of the mortal body, because they shall be incorruptible, both of the blessed, who shall be ever in glory, and of the damned, who shall be ever in punishments: "For this corruptible must put on incorruption; and this mortal must put on immortality."
And since the body will be incorruptible and immortal, there will no longer be the use of food or of the marriage relations: "For in the resurrection they shall neither marry nor be married, but shall be as the Angels of God in heaven." This is directly against the Jews and Mohammedans: "Nor shall he return any more into his house."
(c) The Integrity of the Risen Bodies.--Both the good and the wicked shall rise with all soundness of body which is natural to man. He will not be blind or deaf or bear any kind of physical defect: "The dead shall rise again incorruptible," this is to mean, wholly free from the defects of the present life.
(d) The Age of the Risen Bodies.--All will rise in the condition of perfect age, which is of thirty-two or thirty-three years. This is because all who were not yet arrived at this age, did not possess this perfect age, and the old had already lost it. Hence, youths and children will be given what they lack, and what the aged once had will be restored to them: "Until we all attain the unity of faith and of the knowledge of the Son of God, unto a perfect man, unto the measure of the age of the fullness of Christ."

CONDITION OF THE BLESSED
It must be known that the good will enjoy a special glory because the blessed will have glorified bodies which will be endowed with four gifts.
(a) Brilliance.--"Then shall the just shine as the sun in the kingdom of their Father."
(b) Impassibility (i.e., Incapability of Receiving Action).--"It is sown in dishonor; it shall rise in glory." "And God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes; and death shall be no more. Nor mourning, nor crying, nor sorrow shall be anymore, for the former things are passed away."
(c) Agility.--"The just shall shine and shall run to and fro like sparks among the reeds."
(d) Subtility.--"It is sown a natural body; it shall rise a spiritual body." This is in the sense of not being altogether a spirit, but that the body will be wholly subject to the spirit

Knowledge of our weakness purifies us

2005-03-20T01:12:00.000-06:00

This has been an awesome lent! One more week to go and then.... Easter!
Our gracious Lord has given me the grace to deny myself this lent in a way that I haven't been able to in years! What joy comes to the heart when little sacrifices are made for Love! The first three weeks of lent I was like a 'strong man'. I was able to live without all those little things that I was so attatched to: computer, chocolate, diet coke... They were really addictions.
It was during the fourth week that I fell. I broke my penance about three times. I was feeling a little sick and tired and then a thousand excuses came as to why I can 'have a little chocolate' or get on the computer to look something up. After taking pleasure in these created things the soul feels completely wretched. The suffering I felt for being unfaithful was not worth the miniscule pleasure that I received from eating and reading news that I really didn't need to know for any good or holy reason. Why did I do it when I knew it wasn't good for me? Because I am a weak sinner, that's why. So after a few days of suffering I thought to myself - how can this be redeemed? How can I make up for what I've done? And St. Joseph answered me on his feast day: "Offer up the suffering and humiliation you received because of your infidelity and all will be made new." And I believe, O my God, that you will give me even more than if I hadn't fallen at all. O my glorious and merciful Love, how great You are!
This reminds me of something that happened during my sorrowful time of sin a few years ago. I was suffering one day so much that I had to lay down on the couch. As I lay there in my grief the pain increased so much that I said to myself, "What is happening to me?"
My five year old son was on the floor with colors and paper and he was scribbling with a red color and as I was asking this question to myself he cried out in his sweet little voice, "It's the fire of God's Love! It's the fire of God's Love!" From the mouth of babes...

Have a Blessed and Fruitful Lent!

2005-02-08T21:45:00.000-06:00

Have mercy on us!

"Remember, O man, you are dust and to dust you shall return"

I will be giving up computer time during this holy season of Lent. I'll be back after Easter and I hope you will be, too. God Bless!

The Mercy of God

2005-02-08T20:15:00.000-06:00

A few years ago, after my conversion, after Our Lord had revealed Himself to me and had worked miracles in my life and had given me signal graces; after He had infused me with wonderful knowledge of the Catholic faith and shown me the beauty of prayer and holiness - after all this - I had the misfortune (through my own fault) of falling into and staying for a long time in mortal sin. It began with a slackening off of little sacrifices I had made and then, after being deeply hurt by someone, I fell.

I want to relate this because I believe it shows the great mercy of God. I had deserved Hell because of the sins of my youth, and now after knowing Him and falling, I deserve the deepest, darkest hole in that horrible place. But even though, like a dog that returns to its vomit to lick it up, I went back to a life of living in sin, He still did not abandon me but gently called me back.

I remember during that horrible time that I suffered immensely. It seems to me that I tasted a little of the suffering of the damned. I suffered a darkness and bitterness that cannot be explained. And yet, I went to confession very often. For months I went daily. This time of sorrow lasted almost two years. I was trying to get up out of the mudhole I had fallen into, but the weight of the mud kept pulling me back in.

Even though I was so wicked during this time, Our Lord answered my prayers for others with miracles. I didn't understand it, and I still don't. It seems that He answered them quicker and more amazingly then than He does now.

I had a job as a substitute Postal Carrier, so I spent most days riding in my car and I would listen to the local Christian radio station. The new songs that came out during that time felt like they were written just for me, and they played when I needed them most. One of my favorites was a song by Bob Carlisle called "We Fall Down". The chorus is sung by a choir of children and goes like this:
We fall down, we get up
We fall down, we get up
We fall down, we get up
And the saints are just the sinners
who fall down and get up.
There was some other song about a little child being picked last for the "team" at school for recess and how God was there looking down even then, and the song proceded through tough times in life, always saying God was there and watching each event with Love, but I have no idea what that song is or who sang it... It really, really touched a chord.

Anyway, time went by and I gradually picked myself up (with the extraordinary grace of God, of course) and began to strive for holiness again. But I was always a little discouraged and felt like I had failed and lost something that could never be regained.

At my parish mission one day, there was this really holy priest, and he told us to close our eyes-right then and there- and just wait. He said that Jesus would give each one of us a gift. I obeyed and closed my eyes and waited, and this is what I saw... I was standing several yards away from Our Lord and taking all of my past sins I put them into a tan colored bag and with all my might I threw them towards Him and they landed at His precious feet. I didn't want to look at them anymore, so I just stared into that beautiful Face, all the while saying to myself, "I'm not gonna look down, I'm not gonna look down, I don't want 'em anymore, I'm not gonna look down..." And then (in a most beautiful way) He smiled at me and said, "Look down". I looked and to my amazement there was no longer a bag of sin, but a huge and brilliant diamond that reached right up to His knees!

I am writing this because this "vision" was not my own imagination working. It was like something that was really happening. It was a precious gift from God and I believe it reveals a great truth.

I believe that when we fall into sin and get back up, without presumption, that we can become greater saints than before. I compare it to the fall of our first parents, and say with the Church, "O happy fault!" Just as the fall of Adam and Eve brought us the grace of redemption, our past sins can obtain for us a deep humility and, in a way, force us into the arms of Jesus. When we are humbled to the dirt and there is nothing left in us but sorrow, we need to have complete confidence in the great mercy of God and live the rest of our lives in Love for Him who is so GREAT and LOVING and MERCIFUL!!!

I praise you, Lord, for you have raised me up

and did not let my enemies rejoice over me.

O Lord, my God,

I cried out to you and you healed me.

Lord, you brought me up from hell;

you kept me from going down into the pit.

Sing praise to the Lord, you faithful;

give thanks to God's holy name.

For divine anger lasts but a moment;

divine favor lasts a lifetime.

At dusk weeping comes for the night;

but at dawn there is rejoicing.

Complacent, I once said, "I shall never be shaken."

Lord when You showed me favor

I stood like the mighty mountains.

But when you hid your face

I was struck with terror.

To you Lord, I cried out;

with the Lord I pleaded for mercy:

"What gain is there for my life blood,

from my going down to the grave?

Does dust give you thanks

or declare Your faithfulness?

Hear, O Lord, have mercy on me;

Lord, be my helper."

You changed my mourning into dancing;

You took off my sackcloth

and clothed me with gladness.

With my whole being I sing

endless praise to you.

O Lord, my God,

forever will I give you thanks. - Psalm 30

The Eyes of God

2005-02-07T01:28:00.000-06:00

My favorite picture of Jesus.

Oh! What will it be like to look into the flesh and blood eyes of the God-Man? How beautiful and pure are those eyes. How piercing they must be! To see those eyes would surely cause one to die of Love. What a blessed death!

Tidbit: A Saint once said that it was revealed to her that His eyes are hazel.

Tired...

2005-02-03T22:44:00.000-06:00

I'm one of those people who stay tired all day long, and then about 5 pm get a rush of energy and I'm ready to go until 2 in the morning. The only problem is that my dear children aren't "one of those people". Oh well, when you have nothing else to give Our Lord - give him your state of being tired. I received quite a bit of hope from this quote by Fulton J. Sheen:
"Two of the greatest converts that Our Blessed Lord ever made, the Syro-Phoenician woman and this woman (the woman at the well), were made when he was tired. When he seemed most unfit to do His Father's business, He did it most effectively."

Our heart longs for God

2005-01-31T13:17:00.000-06:00

Like Saint Paul I can say, "I have not already reached perfection, but this I do: forgetting what lies behind, and stretching forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the prize to which I am called in the life to come." He also compares life to a race. And what a long race it is! But what a prize! The prize is no less than the possession of God Himself who is the fulfillment of all the desires and longings of our hearts!

I challenge you all to a holy competition. Let us see who can LOVE more! I dare you to take up the challenge and begin today to try and live every moment for Him who is the only One who is worthy of our LOVE. We can do only very little things, but how generously every little thing we do for LOVE is rewarded! And we usually have to do those very little things anyway... So why not do them for LOVE? For example, this morning, when I folded my clothes I said, "For thee, dear Lord." Or when I made dinner, "For thee, dear mother." (Since Jesus is so pleased when we honor His Holy Mother.) And before I began typing I knelt down in front of the picture I have of Our Lady and the Child Jesus, prayed a Hail Mary, and asked her to do good through me. Later, when I play "Hi, Ho Cherry O!" with my four year old, - even though I really, really don't want to - I will do it for LOVE. Such little insignificant things, but it makes Our Lord smile! Not to mention the graces poured out upon my family and (I dare say) the whole world! Even when I do things I really, really like to do - like read ancient history to my 10 and 11 year olds for history today - I do it all for LOVE. But how can we be filled with LOVE when our hearts are filled with things of the world?

Saint Augustine said, "God means to fill each one of you with what is good; so cast out what is bad! If he wishes to fill you with honey and you are full of sour wine, where is the honey to go? The vessel must be emptied of its contents and then be cleansed. Yes, it must be cleansed even if you have to work hard and scour it. It must be made fit for the new thing." So when we decide to work for LOVE, we have to get rid of all the bad things we are attached to so that we can receive the LOVE we want to work for. We can aquire this detachment little by little. Pick one thing and start with that. That's what we, as Catholics, do during lent. We give up things we are attached to so that we can become more attached to God and He can fill that empty space with Himself. Saint Augustine compares God to honey and the bad habits we have with sour wine. But he goes on to say that "whatever we say cannot express the glorious reality that is God." Whatever we say about God is always necessarily less than the full truth! It is mind boggling to try to imagine the beauty, sweetness, majesty, etc, etc, etc. of God! Nothing we can think of will ever reach the AWESOME reality! My favorite example is that of a LOVER... what pleasure we have when we love someone who is beautiful, intelligent, kind, caring, rich, has everything we ever dreamed of and we find out that that person loves us back with all his heart! What bliss! Multiply that to the millionth power and that doesn't even compare with what union with God is!

"Eye has not seen, ear has not heard, nor has the heart of man conceived what God has prepared for those who LOVE Him."

"Take delight in the Lord and He will give you your heart's desire"

Back to earth...

2005-01-30T11:38:00.000-06:00

My feet are on the ground again... After floating around for a couple of weeks and longing for heaven and desiring to "save the world", I now long for Reeses Peanut Butter Cups, chocolate chip cookies, and Vanilla Coke - and I've had my share this morning, believe me! (Nursing a 19 month old toddler sure makes you hungry!)

C'est la vie!

It's a good thing Love is not based on feelings but on what we will to think, say, and do.

Thank you, Lord, for chocolate!

In Memory

2005-01-28T19:58:00.000-06:00

Mary Florence Johnson (1923-2004)

She lived in a poor little home all her life and by the time she was 81 it wasn't much more than a shack. She was widowed at the age of 40, with two daughters and two sons left to raise. She never sought for anything more than what she had and lived her life for her children. She was Catholic, although I don't believe she knew her faith much at all. It wasn't before my conversion that she realized that missing Sunday Mass was a sin, but as soon as she knew it she was there every Sunday. She prayed everyday... She prayed the rosary three times a day (in record time) and read every little prayer and letter from various priests that she got in the mail (Priests of the Sacred Heart, Miraculous Medal Association, etc.) She loved the little trinkets they sometimes sent her and always had one of them around her neck or pinned to her dress (notice the MM around her neck in the picture). She was my "little monmon" when I was a child, "me-me" after I had children, and now she's my beloved grandmother in heaven. I never knew the beauty of her soul until she died, but the moment her soul was released from her body it seems to me that God rent the heavens for a little while and revealed to me and others from her immediate family the beauty that we had never seen while she was on earth... and we were amazed at her glory!

She died at the Heart Hospital in Lafayette, La. Saturday, November 27 at 3:00 am. (About a month before, driving to see the movie Therese, I had accidentally turned into this very same hospital thinking it was United Artists and as I read the sign as I was driving away a premonition of something to come struck my heart and I thought to myself, "O God, what is it?") She had been in the hospital for three days and was in perfect health before that. (Me-me always did things fast). I was there with my two babies and as it was getting late we went into the van outside in the parking lot and there the babes went to sleep. I was praying the Hail Mary over and over on automatic pilot and begging for her life to be spared, but God was ready for her. At around 3 am the weather became so bad that the whole van was shaking... I was falling asleep, but still praying... I sat up with a jerk and said, "My Jesus, pardon and mercy through the merits of Your Holy Wounds!" and a few minutes later I saw headlights. It was my cousins coming from the hotel nearby... I knew what to expect... we ran into the hospital and she was gone. The tempest outside blew on... Sitting there in shock I remembered how Celine had ran outside when her sister St. Therese died, and how it was cloudy, and how she had said to herself, "If only the stars were out!" and immediately the clouds parted and she could see a patch of clear sky and the stars shining in the firmament. I thought how I would like such a gift and so I went outside and looked up and to my surprise there, in the cloudy sky, was a perfect clear circle with two shining stars and a little cloud that looked like the shape of an R (my name starts with R)! And as we drove back that night all the lights in Lafayette were out... no stoplights, no streetlights, just darkness... the tempest began again and I could hardly keep the van on the road. The wind was blowing it and the leaves were falling almost as hard as the rain... but on the horizon, in a patch of clear sky, was the full moon shining... a sign of hope for me and a symbol of glory!

As the Gospel read at her funeral Mass said, "Father glorify your name!... I have glorified it and will glorify it again..." Yes, God glorified Himself by taking my grandmother to heaven and he will glorify it again each time he takes one of his saints home.

Words of Wisdom

2005-01-26T21:58:00.000-06:00

Every Wednesday Our Holy Father, Pope John Paul II, gives a catechetical speech to his children - all the faithful throughout the world - and I want to share with you two of his quotes:

"Prayer helps to discover the loving face of God. He never abandons his people but guarantees that, notwithstanding trials and suffering, in the end good triumphs." I have already experienced the truth of these words... Prayer does reveal to one the loving face of God. It is not some extraordinary vision but something very hidden that happens in the heart of the one who is faithful to prayer.

"If one is great, if one exalts oneself and is proud, the Lord does not protect one; if one thinks one is great, the Lord does not have mercy on one; but if one abases oneself, the Lord has mercy on one and protects one." Yes, I want to be humble. I want to be humble like Mary who said, "Behold the handmaid of the Lord. Let it be done unto me as you have said." I know that I have abundant reasons to humble myself and I also know that humility is nothing other than the TRUTH. I am nothing but sin without the grace of God... All the evil that I have done in my life comes from me and all the good that I have done in my life was the good done by Jesus through me. But I also know that the Lord humbles the mighty and exalts the lowly and for this I praise You, my God! How glorious is Your Name through all the earth!

I ask you to say a prayer for our Holy Father, for his health and that he may be with us yet a little while longer.

From the Blue Book...

2005-01-25T22:26:00.000-06:00

Here are the St. Bridget Prayers and promises that I wrote about in the previous post. I promise that if you are faithful you will see MIRACLES happen in your life!!

The Conversion of a Saint

2005-01-25T21:41:00.000-06:00

Today the Church celebrates the feast of the Conversion of St. Paul. He was knocked off his horse and saw a vision of Our Lord and became one of the most fervent Apostles of the early Church. Well, I didn't get knocked off of a horse, but here's how my conversion went:

About 12 years ago, I was living a very sinful life. I was born Catholic, went to Sunday Mass, and that's about it. I spent my teenage years in all kinds of grievious sin... You name it, I did it... I was miserable and I didn't know why. It didn't help that I knew nothing of my faith, even though I did attend CCD (the teachers didn't know their faith either) and *God* to me was an impersonal blob in the sky.

One day I was left sitting in a friends car for a few minutes (it was his mothers car) and I remember feeling so hopeless. I asked myself, "Is this all there is to life?" I was bored so I turned around to look at what I could find in the back seat and I discovered this little blue prayer book. I had nothing else to do, so I flipped through the pages. Little did I know that this was the beginning of the end of the world as I knew it. I saw some prayers that had promises attached to them - 15 promises to be exact. The book said that they were given in a vision to this person called Saint Bridget of Sweden and the prayers were all about the sufferings of Our Lord during His passion and death on the cross. I became very excited because the promise were awesome and I had no idea that God was so generous.

To make a long story short, I said the prayers every day for a year, just as the book said you had to do to gain the promises, and I received more than I ever imagined... I was led to the fullness of the truth and joy beyond all human expectation! Oh! how I wish I could plunge your soul into mine so that you would instantly know and experience all that I have known and experienced since that happy day, but that's impossible, so you'll just have to wait for Heaven where I will sing the mercies of the Lord forever in the presence of all my dear brothers and sisters who will love and be loved for all eternity!

The Loveliness of the Lord

2005-01-23T16:41:00.000-06:00

Today at Mass we read Psalm 27... the second verse says:
One thing I ask of the LORD; this I seek: to dwell in the house of the LORD all the days of my life, that I may gaze on the loveliness of the LORD and contemplate his temple.

The Loveliness of the Lord! How can we comprehend it? We have never seen Him face to face, and indeed we could not bear it; for who can see the face of God and live? But we can, as it were, see him through a veil... through the lattices... We can glimpse some of that Infinite Beauty in prayer! The more we go to meet Jesus in prayer, the more He will reveal Himself to us. To what can I compare thee, O most beautiful of men? To an awe-inspiring sunset? To the beauty of a newborn babe? To the glorious rainbow? To a young and tender maiden? No, all of these things fall far short in comparison to You who are God and the Creator of all these things. Think of the most beautiful breathtaking thing that you have ever seen and you will not come close to the Beauty of God!

Oh, what will Heaven be? What will I see when I get there? How will it be to stand before You, my Lord? You who I love with all my heart and above all things! I long to see Your face, O Lord, show me Your face! Reveal to all Your Beauty, Glory, Power, Majesty, and Wisdom so that all may love You and serve You and enjoy You for all eternity!

He asks such a small thing from us: to follow His commandments, and in return He will reward us with more than we can ever imagine or deserve. It will seem like nothing to have lived a long life of suffering when we finally have possession of that glorious reward that He gives to those who love Him! My God, I would do anything to save souls! Anything! Just hold my hand and don't let me offend You and then do what You will with me!

Let the Saints draw you to an ever greator LOVE of GOD!

2005-01-21T23:12:00.000-06:00

St. Agnes

2005-01-21T22:42:00.000-06:00

St. Agnes, Virgin and Martyr, Pray for us!

Love waits for you!

2005-01-20T18:21:00.000-06:00

October 2004 - October 2005

O my hidden Jesus, may I love you more than life itself! You hide Yourself under the species of humble bread and allow me to come into Your presence to speak with You as a friend as often as I desire. O how I love these intimate trysts in which I can pour out my heart to You in silence and receive your Peace and Joy, Your Wisdom and Love in abundance. O Lord, it seems to me that I would do anything to make you known and loved by all... I greatly desire that You reveal Yourself to the nations, so that You may receive the praise and adoration You deserve!

Out of the darkness...

2005-01-18T22:44:00.000-06:00

and into the LIGHT!

Reading _The Life of Christ_ by Fulton Sheen in the presence of our Eucharistic Lord today I had ample material for meditation...

"The closer a person approaches God, the less worthy he feels. A painting under candlelight shows fewer defects than under the brilliance of the sun; so too souls who are some distance from God feel more certain of their moral integrity than those who are very close to Him... In the presence of the holiest of creatures, the soul becomes self-accusing and broken-hearted with the weight of its defects. As evil men feel their guilt more in the presence of an innocent babe than in the companionship of those who are wicked like themselves, so he who loves God is the most deeply burdened with the sense of his own unworthiness... As dust in the room cannot be seen until the light is let in, so no man can know himself until this Light shows him his true condition." ~ Bishop Fulton J. Sheen

O Lord let me see myself as You see me. Shine your most holy light on my soul and let me see it in all truth... I want to see all that is ugly in me so that I may fight to be rid of it, but only with Your strength and Your grace can I even begin to try. Amen.

Method of Prayer

2005-01-17T21:41:00.000-06:00

Yesterday at our monthly Carmelite meeting our instructor spoke to us about the seven steps of mental prayer. I will post them here along with a few quotes from Saint Teresa of Avila:

1 - Preparation
The preparation serves to bring us close to Our Lord; to place ourselves in the presence of God with lively faith and humble attitudes of a soul that knows itself to be a child of God
"I say that how they are to begin is very important - in fact, all important. They must have a great and very resolute determination to perservere until reaching the end..." ~ St. Teresa of Avila

2 - Reading or Study a Picture of Christ
Serves to provide a subject for loving conversation with our Lord.
Spiritual books can lead us to a deeper knowledge and love for Christ. At the top of the list is Holy Scripture, especially the Four Gospels. You can also choose from the numerous and enlightening documents of the Church: encyclicals, the Catechism of the Catholic Church, etc...
Anything by the Saints, esp. the Doctors of the Church (with 33 of them you have ample material for a whole lifetime)
Pictures of the Sacred Humanity of Our Lord, Our Lady, the Saints, Icons can help us focus on the mysteries of our faith.
A book is read for a few minutes - perhaps five or ten minutes, or only two or three if that be sufficient. A few paragraphs or even a couple of sentences may serve the purpose. This reading is to be done slowly and attentively - not with the rapidity customary in other forms of reading.

3 - Meditation
Reflect upon the material, ask oneself questions: who, what, why, for what reason? Use the imagination. We do this to better understand God's infinite Love for us and respond to Him with our own Love. If we are distracted we should just say no to the distraction when we realize what has happened, come back to our meditation and use the book at hand if needed by reading a few more lines...

4 - Loving Colloquy
This is intimate conversation with Our Lord. It is the most important part of prayer. During this time the soul talks directly to Christ as a friend would speak to a most beloved friend. Speak slowly and in your own words. You need not say much and if you have nothing at all to say, just look lovingly at Christ. Once there was a poor peasant who was seen entering the church after work every evening. He was known to stay there for quite a long time. His parish priest approached him and asked what he did during this time in the church and he replied, "I look at Jesus and He looks at me." What a sublime prayer! If this is all we do then we are doing very much indeed. Most of the time I sit with Jesus and every few minutes I tell Him how much I love Him and how I long for Him to be loved by everyone...
"Those who by such a method can enclose themselves within this little heaven of our soul, where the Maker of heaven and earth is present, and grow accustomed to refusing to be where the exterior senses have gone... they are following an excellent path and will not fail to drink water from the fount..." ~ St. Teresa of Avila

5 - Thanksgiving
Thank God for his many blessings, temporal and spiritual

6 - Offering
I give myself to you, O Lord, that your most Holy and Perfect Will may be accomplished in me

7 - Petition
We pray for the needs of others, especially salvation and sanctification, for the whole people of God, for all the world
We pray for or own needs and desires

"More is given than is asked for, beyond what we could desire." ~ St. Teresa of Avila

For the Glory of God

2005-01-16T22:28:00.000-06:00

I've started this blog for one reason only: The Greatest Glory of God

May each letter I type be an act of Love to You, my Beloved; may my thoughts and prayers draw others to search for You who are the Joy and Desire of all hearts! May many souls be drawn to meditation and DIVINE LOVE so that they may be purified and see in ever brighter light Your Beauty and Your Love!

"Prayer is a dialogue of friendship with God..." ~ St. Teresa of Avila

"Prayer is a simple glance toward heaven..." ~ St. Therese of Liseaux